Now that's what I call service!

[Robin Springall]

This one arrived at my inbox today:

Going to bed the other night, I noticed people in my shed stealing things. I phoned the police but was told no one was in the area to help, but they would send someone over as soon as they could.
I hung up. A minute later I rang again. "Hello," I said, "I called you a minute ago because there were thieves in my shed. You don't have to hurry now, because I've shot them."

Withing minutes there were half a dozen police cars in the area, plus a helicopter and an armed response unit. They caught the burglars red-handed.

One of the officers said: "I thought you said you'd shot them." I replied: " I thought you said there was no one available."